A Dream. A Life. A Need. A flaw.

I've always had this dream as a child where I'd be sleep in a bed and just when I'd get comfortable the bed would disappear. The fall. My body would fall and fall into darkness until I was met with another bed to catch me. Again and again I would fall, but just when I thought I was going to disappear into darkness a bed would catch me.

Looking back at this dream from my childhood I begin to wonder about grace. Was the bed God's way of breaking my fall with cushion or was it a foreshadow of my insecurities to come? Nevertheless, I'm tired of the cycle. I want my money up because I'm tired of the comedown. I'm tired of catching my footing only to say "What now?". Just when I think I have a grasp on this thing there is something coming up.

I am currently working my last job because I've come realize that I am a CEO and not an employee. I'm sick and tired of companies thinking they can work me then throw me away because "the needs of the business change". My stability needs to change and I refuse to lose my footing because I deserve better than what many of these companies think I am worth. Frankly no one can ever pay me enough to delay my dreams. I'm happy that I am a fighter. I appreciate my determination because I see too many people working jobs they hate for 20+ years only to retire STILL struggling. That can't be me and my dreams won't be lost while stirring their sauce.

Your dreams matter. My dreams matter. You have to trick the system working for you while you are working for "them". I wrote my first book during my first months at the company I work for when I started over a year ago. I used to struggle writing 20 page research papers in college and now I notice how effortless the 180+ pages were to write in my book. That's the difference from doing what people say that you should do and doing what you were designed for. I was created to create and I've always been creative. I used to put so much emphasis on Education because that was what I was conditioned to believe. I was conditioned to believe that learning another person's information made me superior when it didn't. Don't get me wrong- I believe education is beautiful and important, but the education system is so flawed as I learn more I wonder if it's even worth it. Education should be a right not debt that prevents you from ever gaining enough footing to enjoy your best quality of life. I have a friend who literally goes from mediocre job to mediocre job not using her degree.

The irony of needing a job to gain experience and experience to get a job is troubling. I know people who I went to school with who have degrees and debt working at Home Depot for minimum wage. Here I am a college drop out making more money than them because while they were in school I was out working and gaining experience. It's backwards and it's not fair. Even still with my few extra dollars of experience I don't believe it's worth being unfulfilled when it comes to your passion. I thank God for only accumulating half the debt of my peers. There were so many loops holes that stopped me from getting a fully paid college education as an orphan and I'd see other friends who lived in two parent households qualifying for programs that should've been catered to people like me. I feel like there needs to be courses in high school that equip you more for life than meaningless things that you'll never need. They should be teaching high schoolers extensively about credit and how to create a business plan to execute a successful business so that whether you go to college or start something of your own, you'll do better because you'll know better. We need better curriculums in high school to prepare people for the real world. I was blessed to never work a minimum wage job as an adult, but what about my college educated peers who are forced to because "the needs of the business change".

There are so many opportunities for correction in this flawed system. Companies eliminate jobs from our country only to out source to third world countries for cheaper. Even then, I'm not saying the opportunities given to them are unnecessary because I honestly think it's disgusting to expect someone in another country to work for less than minimum wage. Minimum wage in America is difficult enough to live on. It's not fair that we are disposable in the eyes of major cooperations because our quality of service has began to decrease. Phone support has decreased because there is no longer value for people within major companies and it shows. There has to be more to life than this and I want to see more happy people following their dreams than becoming bitter because they didn't have the courage to try. Without failure there is no success. Even if you fall a few times eventually if you try enough you'll have no choice other than to fly.