Flights to NOWhere

It started as an exciting adventure. Me colliding with my inner child anticipating thoughts worthwhile. Weeks later I'm still here and the invigorating thoughts that once seemed to soothe me now no longer move me. Lingering through terminals connecting with many strangers that continuously force conversations. A simple question encourages a lie that I know longer wish to provide yet still I comply secretly cringing inside. Where are you headed? In my mind I answer nowhere which seems more like an internal destination than my once excited anticipation. On the outside, I politely force a smile in attempts to conjure up a destination that seems worthwhile. Late at night sharp pains shoot up through the back of my thighs and drown out my silent cries. Swollen feet begin to reek from wearing the same shoes for days and weeks. My pain oblivious to others because here I am once again masking smiles, blending in. Forcing smiles should be a sin when hiding all the pain I'm in. The longer I stay, the more I begin to dissipate within my broken dreams. They haunt me within the many nights when I sit awake. I wonder if I'll ever get it right or does my success linger on those imaginary flights that seem to be nowhere insight.